Women are socialized to make men feel good. We’re socialized to “let you down easy.” We’re not socialized to say a clear and direct “no.” We’re socialized to speak in hints and boost egos and let people save face. People who don’t respect the social contract (rapists, predators, assholes, pickup artists) are good at taking advantage of this.

“No” is something we have to learn. “No” is something we have to earn. In fact, I’d argue that the ability to just say “no” to something, without further comment, apology, explanation, guilt, or thinking about it is one of the great rites of passage in growing up, and when you start saying it and saying it regularly the world often pushes back. And calls you names.

http://captainawkward.com/2011/03/23/the-art-of-no/

This just really resonates with me. I never realized HOW MUCH I try and let people down easy or be over polite to people who don’t deserve it/don’t need me to.

(via kitteh-neon)

(Source: kitteh-neon-is-chemically-inert)

Notes

1. nightmarishdream reblogged this from ggaspard
2. ggaspard reblogged this from kitteh-neon-is-chemically-inert
3. majorinlove reblogged this from kranjska
4. jesssicakay reblogged this from everything-is-a-baited-hook
5. danceforthatanarchy likes this
6. everything-is-a-baited-hook reblogged this from kranjska
7. kranjska reblogged this from supersoygrrrl
8. glowruiz reblogged this from supersoygrrrl
9. nesbitch likes this
10. plzdiekthnxbye reblogged this from teenmachines
11. littlewalruss reblogged this from calciumatlantic
12. calciumatlantic likes this
13. tierravientomar likes this
14. nicherahe reblogged this from partyocelot
15. nicherahe likes this
16. noid0ne reblogged this from partyocelot
17. noid0ne likes this
18. achleedawn likes this
19. teenmachines likes this
20. ryanxtassi likes this
21. williamleco likes this
22. bredvad likes this
23. caitygee likes this
24. runawaystarling likes this
25. pschlieter likes this
26. lifeonfiction reblogged this from supersoygrrrl
27. zorlock likes this
28. overratedunderwhelmed likes this
29. wornbright reblogged this from supersoygrrrl
30. ednas-elysiums likes this
31. blissandzen likes this
32. supersoygrrrl reblogged this from kitteh-neon-is-chemically-inert
33. duchessoflynds0r likes this
34. mslizzy likes this
35. hooplehead likes this
36. 05221987 reblogged this from amindy07
37. amindy07 reblogged this from serotonical
38. someauthorgirl likes this
39. motivatedslacker likes this
40. cannelledusoleil likes this
41. erissaid likes this
42. serotonical reblogged this from kitteh-neon-is-chemically-inert
43. kitteh-neon-is-chemically-inert posted this